NUMBNESS - THE OPPOSITE OF GOODNESS

In my morning meditation today, part of a 30 day challenge and practice of Willing to the Light I was left with this line echoing in my head "To return to this thing in Source is to reclaim it outside of the field of Separation."

Heard this line on a podcast yesterday from Paul Selif, who channels and I had to repeat it several times, letting it land in a way that I could grasp in both mind and body.

As we journey through these tumultuous times of humanity I have come to realise that the downward slope from this sense of separation and hyper individuation that the world is currently riding through has an inevitable final stage of Numbness.

Indeed humanity as a whole and as individual units has a root in ultimate goodness and that the world is a friendly place, or my belief anyway. So, when I feel into these times of change, I see that the goodness we all came in with is not as omnipresent as it used to be, as something else is creeping in to replace it. My mind brings me the image of the darkness in The Never-ending Story and The Nothing which was a terrifying, unstoppable force that disintegrates the land of Fantasia, representing the loss of human imagination, hope, and belief.

I feel that Humanity is going through this similar theme where ‘The Nothing’ is fast creeping in, threatening to consume humanity’s heart. I see that the opposite of goodness is not bad, evil or even satanic, I'd say it is Numbness..

Also heard this echoed in a podcast with one of my favourite authors Elif Shifak, who I deeply admire..

To be numb is to not feel anything - the good or the bad. In my humble opinion; to live a life without feeling is not to live life

at all.

As what is a stunning pinky, purple cloudy sunrise if not felt in  the heart of a human as a new lease on life and fresh hope. Or what is the point of the luxuriously soft cuteness of a little kitten if not to be felt and received on the skin of a human as innocent joy. And what is the peak of a stunning mountain landscape if not to invoke in the mind of a human as transcendence from the everyday through eagle eyes? Maybe I'm being too human - centric, but all of life is a sensual experience if your eyes are open to it…

The Nothing or Numbness puts a chokehold on sensuality, empathy and most feelings except anger and rage.

Which was my greatest fear as a teenager, when I alone had to battle prescription-happy doctors wanting to get me on the meds of the infamous Anti-Depressants. As a language lover and seeker of truth from early on, I questioned the validity and effectiveness of this drug, asking pushy doctors “How exactly does the medication know how to target only the Depression feelings?” I inherently was wise enough to know that a stupid tablet wasn’t going to track down the depressed feelings and leave all the others intact, all my feelings would become ANTI. I would become devoid of all the downers and the uppers, so despite my depression (which turned out to be systemic oppression and environmental anyway), I absolutely loved my moment's of joy, freedom, peace, curiousity and absolute fits of laughter that were so contagious and high, that I myself became a prescription for the depressed. So I accepted my depression as I didn’t want to lose the joy, laughter and deep empathy I felt for my friends - my soul family. Meanwhile my real fam - well my dad anyway consented and supported my decision as he was mostly absent in my life (and likely didn’t want more trips to the hospital where his wife had recently died).

So everyone was somewhat happy with my depression status (pun intended!) as I know my dad understood that I was choosing not to numb out, not to be a prescription junkie as he was an alcoholic, who had also chosen Numbness many years back, because the pain and emotional charge from his traumas were never dealt with or felt in any safe contained way for them to move through him. All this was unsaid, but I know my dad knew that I was choosing life not a zombified existence closer to death. Another reason to love my dad in hindsight, he knew I was breaking the generational trauma cycle, but of course didn’t have words for it. May he rest in Power, a man who ultimately died from his Numbness and proximity to darkness.

Which is why I see and feel so viscerally how Numbness is back with a vengeance, spreading like a great plague across the globe. The escalation of the numbness is obvious to me when I see how many people have become desensitized to witnessing a genocide live on our mobiles, how casually and easily people have accepted the dehumanisation of a whole group of people, 'over there'. And ultimately - through various means and reasons - how cut off from the heart field’s a majority of humans are now due to the hardcore brainwash programming of the elites, all tracing back to a tiny illegal nation that start with I and ends in hell. The dehumanisation, desensitisation and deconstruction of systems of care and community is a deliberate act for the 1% to benefit and further profit off us.

Elif Shifak also talks about the numbness as the opposite of goodness, which really made me stop and question my perception of Goodness as I had done with Niceness, as I used to think that evil was the true opposite of Goodness.

But where does evil start? I don not believe that people are inherently born evil and feel that only a tiny population can truly be described as evil.

When you reflect on how quickly the slope dropped from 2020's social experiment of Separation to the now of this very lived experience of desensitisation and a forced disconnect of what is natural and organic to the inorganic, man-made and synthesised rubbish; it becomes glaringly obvious that Numbness is the desired state for humans - if the elites are to claim more control over us humans, so we can be not quite living but not quite dead - a melancholic misery in survival mode operating in deep servitude to those who seemingly have the powers and hold all the cards. No wonder the world is collapsing, it’s because the powers that were are actively squeezing the life force out of us, from every possible angle.

This is not to leave you with the feelings of Despair, as honestly despair is a luxury in these times. In fact it leaves me charged with Hope as when the human is pushed from all angles possible, then the only solution is to change or die. Some are changing and some sadly are dying. This is a massive chapter in Humanity’s book. The collective and bigger solution is to  LOVE down harder and start by turning off or deleting your ANTI-Social apps, controlled by one very numb, zombified man.

Take every moment you can to stop to smell the roses, play with that cute kitten, be in nature, eat that extra piece of your favourite cheese, to swim in the sea purely because YOU still fucken can! Because the only way to avoid dehumanisation is through the re-awakening of your senses, the rewilding of your mind and hearts and to forget the illusion of separation and BE in community as much as you can..

HOW?

Give to the homeless guy your sandwich on the way home from work, or a pound, offer a massage to your old neighbor with the broke back for free, cook a meal for that disheveled and exhausted single mama four doors down from you, listen to the lonely stranger sat on the same park bench, same time every day. It is okay because the little things do fucken matter. This is ALCHEMY in action, as no man (or woman) is an island, one day YOU could be that single mama, that homeless guy, the old neighbour who hasn’t been touched in almost a decade, BE the light and the changes you want to see in the world.

At all costs and at every opportunity avoid Numbing out on an individual and societal level. The world and humanity’s very existence depends in this final stage before we descend into absolute darkness.

Stay in the light through feeling, through community care, through the cracks in your own broken heart that are allowing the fractal light in, reminding you of how broken you are but also how fucken alive you still are.

Feeling and Community Connection are the solutions. Stay in the light..

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